Update - Grandma

Evetually, grandma didn't undergo op. 

Again, this is my own interpretation of the events.  I think that we tried to grab the opportunity (ie go for the risky op), but it proved to be difficult to seize. 

In the first place, the cardiologist didn't want to commit to a risk factor, and only say "motality rate is high".  Maybe he didn't expect the family to make the decision to go for the risky op.  When the family made that decision, he got no choice but to give the risk factor - 10%, adding that almost all families will not go op if the risk factor is >5%.

Eventually, the family succumb to the pressure.  I think that's what the cardiologist want to achieve. 

I had a talk with my 2 aunties.   For what they have done for the family and their mum, only their opinions and their choices matter (to me).  I can fully understand why and how conforming to social norm ("families will not go op if the risk factor is >5%") is important.  I can fully understand how and why they worry about the unknow "in-between" scenarios after the op (like total/partial paralyze). 

Thus life! Thus life! The world is full of grey areas; almost nothing is black or white.  It is very very sad to be sick.